I had a very vivid dream last night. I remember thinking to myself that this could be real, while I was dreaming. I remember being in the field. There were people all around searching for their families. It was the end of the world, and I was searching for Carmen.
Everyone was panicking; It was chaos. I was afraid, but calm. I had to find her. I came into a neighborhood. Cars were left abandoned in the streets. People were crying and holding one another. I saw her in the distance. She was with friends, it appeared. I walked towards her; So very nervous. I wasn’t sure what I was doing or going to say, but I knew I needed to speak with her at least one last time. She welcomed me with open arms, and I felt, for that moment, that everything was going to be alright. That the world was safe and sound. But as soon as she pulled away, I realized I was wrong. I told her that I love her deeply and I pleaded with her that if the end of the world is not today, would she give me another chance to redeem myself. And then she spoke the words that, alone, could destroy the earth and shatter the hearts of every living soul that walked it. “Even if the world doesn’t end today, I never want to be with you again.” My heart felt like it’d been pounded on and dropped off the cliff. I was devastated. I turned from her and began to walk away.
I found a vacant area in the field where everyone seemed to be clutching on to one another. I sat in silence, thinking to myself how shitty it is to die today, without her by my side. Everyone began counting down in unison, as if they were counting down to the new year. They no longer sounded fearful, but celebratory. As the countdown reached single digits, I began to see the light bursting through the cracks of the earth. At that moment I knew this was real. The light got brighter and the cracks in the earth grew larger. As the time neared zero, the earth began to split apart and burst in every direction. I remember being blasted into what felt like space. I still felt alive, but I felt like I was nowhere as well. I could see chunks of the earth floating around me. This couldn’t have been death, I thought. There was still too much presence of my life around me. But I didn’t know what to make of it. I was just floating into the darkness.